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김순님/2025-04-23

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
Many people think earning the money is the best productive work. People's income contribute their wealth. We usually distinguish the success with result of it. But I think I am the productive person too even though I didn't make money. I have been spending my time for myself. It makes me satisfied and it gives me feel success.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
HELLO, MS. SUNNY!
Yes, many people think that when we hear the word "productive," it is associated with money.
However, it does not fully define that way; we can be productive by doing a lot of things, and we see results. 
Have a great day!
Aki~


Many people think earning the money is the best productive work.
>>> Many people think earning money is the most productive work.

People's income contribute their wealth.
>>> People's income contributes to their wealth.

We usually distinguish the success with result of it.
>>> We usually distinguish the success from its result.

But I think I am the productive person too even though I didn't make money.
>>> But I think I am a productive person too, even though I didn't make money.

I have been spending my time for myself.
>>> I have been spending my time on myself.

It makes me satisfied and it gives me feel success.
>>>  It makes me satisfied, and it gives me a sense of success.
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