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The most popular festival

양기연/2025-04-16

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

I think the Han River International Fireworks Festival is the most popular one. It is held in fall annually, just one day in Seoul, and more than one million people come to see it every year.The festival includes a variety of cultural events and performances. I haven't attended the festival because I am concerned about a big crowd. But we can see the fireworks on the rooftop of any building including my house if the weather permits.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Gi Yean!

I can't imagine how beautiful an International Fireworks Festival is. I like watching fireworks as well; they give me a great feeling. I also agree with you—I only watch them from outside of my house since I don't like going to crowded places. Still, at least we get to appreciate them in a safer place.

- T. Caitlyn

I think the Han River International Fireworks Festival is the most popular one.

>> CORRECT

It is held in fall annually, just one day in Seoul, and more than one million people come to see it every year.

>> It is held annually in the fall, for just one day in Seoul, and more than one million people come to see it every year.

The festival includes a variety of cultural events and performances.

>> CORRECT

I haven't attended the festival because I am concerned about a big crowd.

>> CORRECT

But we can see the fireworks on the rooftop of any building including my house if the weather permits.

>> However, we can see the fireworks from the rooftop of any building, including my house, if the weather permits.