¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the greatest lesson you have learned from a book or a movie?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-18 195

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your effort today.
I can see form your writing that you need to widen your vocabulary.
You have basic knowledge of sentence structure and that's a good start.
Now, we just need to make sure that you are familiar with the right terms for the right ideas.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
>> I learned the importance of moral standards on a simple day when watching a movie which showed the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball for the LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
>> He picks up trash when he sees it on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
>> He believes that by doing so, he can gather others' luck while some people would just see it as trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.
>> His philosophy encourages me to pick up trash on the street which I now think of as luck. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141696 If you could paint your room with a new color or put on new... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-12-29 555
141695 My feelings when I make a choice for other people ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-28 1203
141694 Which place would you never consider visiting? Why? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 1
141693 What kind of ideas do you consider to be \"great\"? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 1
141692 How can we educate others about environmental issues? ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 565
141691 Homework ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 646
141690 How did you handle moments of frustration or stress during the... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 731
141689 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 544
141688 What advice would you give to someone who just got into a minor... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 604
141687 What activities do Korean do during Seollal or the Korean New... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 1
141686 >Did you like asking for help from your colleagues when you... ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 2
141685 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 668
141684 Regular maintenance ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-27 595
141683 Which is better for young people in order to prepare for the... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 726
141682 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 1
141681 Are you a good sport? Explain. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 638
141680 What do you think is the worst sport ever created? Why? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 666
141679 It was a fantastic trip ever in Jeju Island! ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 764
141678 The situation that suits me well nowadays ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 571
141677 Homework ÇÑ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-26 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04