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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How can being brave help you in life?

작성자: 배*빈
2024-11-27 113

회원님의 영작문

I think being brave helps me challenge anything in life.

I had a big three challenges in my university’s life.
First, I traveled to Japan with a friend last year. I made the trip’s plan and prepared money on my own for traveling.
Second, I lived in China to study Chinese about 4months and it was first time I lived in abroad for a long time.
Third, I participated in a Chineses speaking contest and I prized third.

I had a lot of experience and broaden my perspective through these challenges. And now, I am not afraid of challenging anything and look forward to face next step. But if I was not being brave, I couldn’t challenge nothing. So, I think that being brave helps me start new things and it is very important part of my life.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Yun Bin,

Wow, I’m really impressed with all the challenges you’ve taken on! It’s amazing how you’ve traveled to Japan, lived in China, and even participated in a speaking contest, all of these show incredible bravery and determination. It’s clear that being brave has opened up many opportunities for you, and you've gained so much experience and confidence from it. Your ability to face new challenges head-on is really inspiring! Keep being brave, because it’s clear that it will continue to lead you to great things in life.

~Teacher Cathy

 

I think being brave helps me challenge anything in life.

>>CORRECT

OR>>I believe being brave helps me take on any challenge in life.

I had a big three challenges in my university’s life.

>>I had three big challenges during my university life.

First, I traveled to Japan with a friend last year.

>>CORRECT

OR>>First, I went to Japan with a friend last year.

I made the trip’s plan and prepared money on my own for traveling.

>>I made plans for the trip and prepared money on my own for traveling.

Second, I lived in China to study Chinese about 4months and it was first time I lived in abroad for a long time.

>>Second, I lived in China to study Chinese for about four months, and it was the first time I lived abroad for a long time.

Third, I participated in a Chineses speaking contest and I prized third.

>>Third, I participated in a Chinese-speaking contest and won third place.

I had a lot of experience and broaden my perspective through these challenges.

>>I gained a lot of experience and broadened my perspective through these challenges.

And now, I am not afraid of challenging anything and look forward to face next step.

>>And now, I am not afraid of challenges and look forward to facing the next step.

But if I was not being brave, I couldn’t challenge nothing.

>>But if I hadn't been brave, I wouldn't have been able to challenge anything.

So, I think that being brave helps me start new things and it is very important part of my life.

>>So, I think that being brave helps me start new things and it is a very important part of my life.

 

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