¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2024-10-03 576

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

***********************
HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: Some people believe the purpose of education is to prepare individuals to be beneficial to society. Others say the purpose of education is to achieve personal ambitions. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

Education is good method for personal ambitions. It needs more information to success, and more information needs studing.
But on the other hand, it is good element of development beneficial to society.
There are all right answer, anybody don't say that other opinion are wrong. But, I think education is stronger society side.
If there is only personal ambition, many nations waste a lot of time and money.
The reason that they do compulsory education is that it helps the development of the country.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~! ^^ Great job! Your essay clearly shows your understanding of the dispute and its key issues, and you explained everything in an easy-to-follow manner.

>>> TEACHER GEMMA

Education is good method for personal ambitions.

>>> Education is a valuable tool for achieving personal goals.

It needs more information to success, and more information needs studying.

>>> It requires knowledge to succeed, and to acquire knowledge, studying is necessary.  

But on the other hand, it is good element of development beneficial to society.

>>> On the other hand, education is a key factor in societal development and benefits everyone.
There are all right answer, anybody don't say that other opinion are wrong. 

>>> All opinions are valid; no one is saying that other viewpoints are wrong.

But, I think education is stronger society side.

>>> However, I believe education is a key strength for society.

If there is only personal ambition, many nations waste a lot of time and money.

>>> If people focus solely on personal ambition, many nations end up wasting time and money.

The reason that they do compulsory education is that it helps the development of the country.

>>> Compulsory education helps with the country's development. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138713 Homwork ½Å*Á¾ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-24 0
138712 Least favorable experience ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-24 702
138711 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-24 678
138710 2024.07.23 ³²*·Ê ¿Ï·á 2024-07-24 661
138709 If you could have it your way, where would you like to go on... Á¤*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 691
138708 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 4
138707 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138706 Are you careful when using electricity? Explain your answer. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 918
138705 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138704 What\'s the typical weather in summer in your country? what are... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 902
138703 What are some reasons why privacy is important for you? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138702 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138701 Which is better? ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 5
138700 nightlife ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138699 Final remarks of \" Books are better than television ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 631
138698 What is your favorite hobby? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 651
138697 Do you buy clothes online? Why or why not? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 0
138696 Do you always believe what people tell you? Why or why not? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 636
138695 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 1
138694 Q) Should parents ask their children to clean their own bedrooms? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-23 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04