¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-06 261

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my apartment is location around factory.
so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your corrected essay. Thank you for sending it. Please go through the correction provided. Speak to you next class! Have a good one! 


Cheers,
Jean~~




                                 


                           Please tell me about the place where you live. Describe your house. Where is it located? Describe it in as much detail as possible.



my apartment is location around factory. so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
>> My apartment is located in a factory area so there are many inconveniences, for example, I have to endure the noise and bad air quality.

The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
>> CORRECT~~

If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
>> If we want to hang out with our friends, we have to endure a long-distance walk to the city. 

I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.
>> I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to our district.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137961 Why do you think parasailing is exciting? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 264
137960 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 249
137959 Fix the relationship with my friend ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 294
137958 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 295
137957 What kind of people do you like to meet? ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 286
137956 Why is it simpler to be nervous than confident in most... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 242
137955 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 0
137954 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 7
137953 Can sadness be useful in people¡¯s lives? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 2
137952 TV ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 298
137951 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 248
137950 Bad habits ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 308
137949 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 1
137948 Does talking about a sad experience help make the person feel... ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 2
137947 homework 11 ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 289
137946 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 1
137945 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 0
137944 HOMEWORK DAY 4 ±è*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 233
137943 6/19 ¿ì*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 1
137942 Wearing uniforms enhances school pride, unity, and community... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-19 286

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04