¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½É*Áø
2024-07-06 257

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

my apartment is location around factory.
so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good evening, Mi Jin!

I'm sending you back your corrected essay. Thank you for sending it. Please go through the correction provided. Speak to you next class! Have a good one! 


Cheers,
Jean~~




                                 


                           Please tell me about the place where you live. Describe your house. Where is it located? Describe it in as much detail as possible.



my apartment is location around factory. so there are many inconvenient things to live. for example i have to endure noisy and bad air .
>> My apartment is located in a factory area so there are many inconveniences, for example, I have to endure the noise and bad air quality.

The biggest drawback is that there are no good facilities around.
>> CORRECT~~

If we want to hang out with our friends, we walk to the city a lot
>> If we want to hang out with our friends, we have to endure a long-distance walk to the city. 

I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to me.
>> I have to go to the city called Daegu, which is close to our district.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137999 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 355
137998 My dream of the future °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 299
137997 Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 321
137996 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1
137995 How do you encourage others to follow good habits or practices? ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 230
137994 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 235
137993 HOMEWORK ÁÖ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 230
137992 If I could celebrate my birthday the way I wanted ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 270
137991 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 1
137990 Do you enjoy meeting new people? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 267
137989 Have you ever had a bad experience with ice cream? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 250
137988 Could you live without your smartphone (or other technology... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 225
137987 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 208
137986 2024.06.21 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 3
137985 double-edged sword ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 249
137984 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-21 0
137983 hacker ÀÓ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 227
137982 Could you live without your smartphone (or other technology... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 236
137981 In which area would you prefer to live, rural or urban? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 206
137980 Make sentences using the words below: Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-20 284

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04