¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is your reason for wanting to be a flight attendant?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: õ*Àº
2024-02-21 382

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

After graduated culinary school and worked in F&B field, I felt like I need more achievement and opportunity to work with diverse people.
I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Rachel!

The Food and Beverage department as well as being  a cabin crew are interrelated since they both deal with service and human relations. You are not changing your career totally. You are only adding more skills to what you already have. I think you are doing great at it.

Below, you can see very few grammar suggestions. Your sentences are long and meaningful as well as interconnected by correct transition words. There is also efficiency in your use of vocabulary words. You did a very good job!

Thank you for your diligence. See you again tomorrow!

-T. Donna~

After graduated culinary school and worked in F&B field, I felt like I need more achievement and opportunity to work with diverse people.
>> After I graduated in culinary school and worked in the F&B field, I felt like I need more achievements and opportunities to work with diverse people.

I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and bring me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.
>> I looked back on myself and what I really enjoyed and what brings me satisfaction was interacting with new people and taking care of their needs.

If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experience are gonna be perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experience.
>> If I become a flight attendant, my personality and service experiences are gonna be/ (going to be)  perfect as a cabin crew and I can broaden my view and improve my skills by various experiences. Very good sentence!

Also, I think aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect people from all over the world and it would be never get boring.
>> Also, I  think that the aviation industry is fascinating to me, because we can connect with people from all over the world and it would be never get boring. Very good sentence!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132151 2.Nov.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1
132150 What would happen if all of the world¡¯s computers suddenly... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 7
132149 If you could go back in time, would you choose the same major... ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1
132148 What kinds of preparations do you do whenever the season changes... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1084
132147 homework_231102 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 1
132146 contribute ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-03 0
132145 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 580
132144 What is a perfect day for you? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 554
132143 The things that I have to do ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 714
132142 What do you want to do today? Why? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 418
132141 What are some safety measures you take when traveling or... ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 1
132140 Accommodation depends on the travel colleague °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 4
132139 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 0
132138 Why should we have hobbies ÀÌ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 5
132137 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 632
132136 What do you know about the jews? Write at least three things... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 1
132135 Homework ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 520
132134 If you were the parent of the rape victim in the case discussed... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 1
132133 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 541
132132 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-02 802

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04