¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

superaged

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-12-15 1954

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think that the superaged society will drop social production ability.

The government should focus on the welfare and safty of the senior than challengable policies.

The young generation should be burden the senior's pention even they don't want to do.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Ms. Lily, it's a great day today!

I completely agree with your opinion that the government should prioritize the needs of the people. By doing so, it could help address the issue of low birth rates and other social problems. Sometimes, the government creates policies that they believe will benefit everyone, but in reality, it only serves to increase their popularity. 
Best regards, 
Aki.


I think that the superaged society will drop social production ability.
>>> CORRECT!

The government should focus on the welfare and safty of the senior than challengable policies.
>>> The government should focus on the welfare and safety of the seniors rather than challenging policies.

The young generation should be burden the senior's pention even they don't want to do.
>>> The young generation should burden the senior's pension even if they don't want to do it.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128461 homework ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1685
128460 What I like when I have free time ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1428
128459 What language do you want to learn and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 925
128458 Should the death sentence be implemented globally? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1220
128457 Jealous. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 2939
128456 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1
128455 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1083
128454 What kind of instant food do you enjoy? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 0
128453 What are the advantages and disadvantages of the popularity of... ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1113
128452 Thursday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1979
128451 Do you think you are good at adapting to new changes? ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1490
128450 Greeting kind that annoys me ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1615
128449 Send a written output about your part-time job in a few... ÀÓ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 2
128448 Traveling alone ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1346
128447 5/25 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1343
128446 The characteristics of territory ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1261
128445 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1761
128444 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1801
128443 An effect of advertisement is great. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1
128442 What are the causes and effects of poverty? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-05-25 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04