¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Á¤
2023-12-07 538

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

1. food diet
In order to increase the health, We have to decide a food diet.
It is much better eat fruits and vegetables rather than instant food.
but, It's doesn't lose weight easily even if we don't have a lot of muscles in our body.
Therefore, we have to eat foods containing protein to be healthy.

2. workout
It is good to go to the gym and exercise, but it costs a lot of money.
These days, more people watch videos and exercise at home.
It is good to workout use money, but It's also good to do aerobic exercise to gain muscle at home.

3. sleep
In order to be health, but It is important to sleep. The average adult sleep time is 8 hours,
and appropriate to sleep in 8-10 hours. If we sleep a lot,
skin gets better, and It is beneficial to health because it improves complexion.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for this Eunice!

1. food diet
In order to increase the health, We have to decide a food diet.
>>> In order to improve health, we have to decide a good diet.
It is much better eat fruits and vegetables rather than instant food.
>>> It is much better to eat fruits and vegetables rather than instant food.
but, It's doesn't lose weight easily even if we don't have a lot of muscles in our body.
>>> However, it doesn't make us lose weight easily even if we don't have a lot of muscles in our body.
Therefore, we have to eat foods containing protein to be healthy.
>>>  correct

2. workout
It is good to go to the gym and exercise, but it costs a lot of money.
>>> correct
These days, more people watch videos and exercise at home.
>>> correct
It is good to workout use money, but It's also good to do aerobic exercise to gain muscle at home.
>>> It is good to workout with the use of money, but It's also good to do aerobic exercise to gain muscle at home.
>>> It is good to spend money for working out, but It's also good to do aerobic exercise to gain muscle at home.

3. sleep
In order to be health, but It is important to sleep. 
>>> In order to be healthy, it is important to sleep well. 
The average adult sleep time is 8 hours, and appropriate to sleep in 8-10 hours. 
>>> The average adult sleep time is 8 hours, and it's appropriate to sleep within 8-10 hours. 
If we sleep a lot, skin gets better, and It is beneficial to health because it improves complexion.
>>> If we sleep a lot, our skin gets better and It is beneficial to health because it improves complexion.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131204 Do you prefer ordering food in person, by phone, or online? Á¤*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 705
131203 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 618
131202 WRITING TASK: What are some reasons why people might not meet... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 1
131201 Homework ±è*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 496
131200 sex education ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 620
131199 What food from other countries would you like to try? ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 3
131198 About silent spring. ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 690
131197 Have you ever visited a national park or wildlife sanctuary?... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 742
131196 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-21 592
131195 What\"s your favorite about your home country? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 761
131194 Monday Homework ÃÖ*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131193 Homework Àü*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131192 Do you wish you could exercise more? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131191 How do you think current wars could be stopped? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 2
131190 Homework Àå*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131189 What are some of the most polluted cities in the world? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131188 Which family holiday is you favorite? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 320
131187 Call ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 462
131186 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 563
131185 Which school subject is least favorite why? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 850

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04