¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

In your opinion, what is insomnia? Please give its pros (if it has) and cons.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*°æ
2023-08-05 2163

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.

If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Great job, Steve! Thank you for doing your homework religiously. Continue to practice and if you have some questions, feel free to ask me. Thank you and see you in class! ~ T.Gelly


Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
>> Insomnia is a sleep disorder where people have difficulty falling asleep and staying asleep as long as desired. 
Insomnia can last a few days or months depending its seriousness. 
>> Correct!
OR
>> It can last for a few days or even months depending on how serious it is.
If you are in insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because insomnia is usually followed by daytime sleepiness, low energy and often a drepssed mind. 
>> If you have insomnia, you need to treat it as soon as possible because it is usually followed by daytime drowsiness, weary and often mind depression.
Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than male. 
>> Statistically, old men are more susceptible to insomnia than young men and females are more vulnerable than males.
So It takes old men and women more care to prevent insomnia than young people and males respectively.
>> So it takes older men and women more attention to prevent insomnia than young people and males.
If you have someone with early stage symptoms of insomnia or in insomnia around you, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent. 
>> Suppose you know someone with early-stage symptoms of insomnia or insomnia around you. In that case, you need to be careful because insomnia is reported to be affected by genetics to some extent.
If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
>> If you're already in insomnia, doctors advise you not to rely on sleeping pills for long-term use for no reason. 
They suggest that it is very important to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
>> They will suggest that it is vital to identify and treat medical conditions contributing to insomnia, such as depression and breathing problems.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133156 Where i want to go in one country ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 2482
133155 What is the best thing to do after graduation? ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 0
133154 Describe your experience watching Cats. ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 0
133153 WRITING TASK: Do you think the types of collections people like... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1
133152 Why do you think there are so many different languages in the... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1402
133151 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1117
133150 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1236
133149 The role of status ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1253
133148 Advice to someone ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1741
133147 Do you prefer domestic or overseas trip? Why? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1608
133146 What do you like best about the Korean culture? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 3
133145 What strategies do you use to handle your duties at work when... Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1227
133144 Tell me about executive floor? Tell me about the roles of menu? Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1717
133143 What advice would you give to someone who is struggling with... ¾ö*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1
133142 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 4
133141 positive thinking ±Ç*¸ð ¿Ï·á 2023-12-12 1633
133140 What I feel about company meetings ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-11 1691
133139 Comfort food ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-11 1203
133138 Homework ÇÏ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-11 2
133137 homework 12.11 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-11 1127

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04