¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

My city is small but it\'s nice

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¿À*Çõ
2022-12-20 1215

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My city is not capital city
But it's nice
My home town is not noise traffic My cousin city is big and noise.
My city is not huge not noise
MY city have too many cars.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Lucas!

Thanks for sending your composition. I appreciate it.  Please check the corrections and alternative sentences. 
See you on Thursday! 

Cheers,
Jean~~

My city is not capital city
>> My city is not the capital city. 
>> or: I don't live in the capital city. 

But it's nice.
>> OR: I still like it though. 

My home town is not noise traffic My cousin city is big and noise.
>> My hometown is not noisy because there's no traffic but my cousin's city is big and noisy. 

My city is not huge not noise
>> My city is not huge so it's not noisy. 
>> NOTE: "Noise" can be a noun or a verb but "noisy" is an adjective. They are two different words. 

MY city have too many cars.
>> However, there are too many cars in my city. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
121344 What do you want to be when you grow up? ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 454
121343 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 577
121342 What is your opinion about the article \"Alcohol as Leading... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 548
121341 Tell us about a memorable, enjoyable, or strange dream you\'ve... ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 621
121340 Talk about how technology has changed in your lifetime. ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 676
121339 Do you think writing will disappear in the future, once... Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 680
121338 Previous class review (Han liver park, eggplant, benefits) À¯*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121337 Cancer ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 0
121336 homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121335 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 0
121334 What ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121333 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1
121332 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 691
121331 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 645
121330 Hi Gemmar ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1716
121329 Homework ±â*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 820
121328 2. ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 613
121327 stupid plan ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 717
121326 How older people viewed in yout country? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 2
121325 How are you similar to your parents? How are you different? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-08-04 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04