¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-12-12 1204

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Helen, 
Thank you for making an essay. Your sentences are good and meaningful.  However, you have to be more aware of your grammatical errors and pronunciation lapses as well as you need to be careful with appropriate word usage and some articles in your sentences. Keep improving.  ~ Teacher QUENNY.. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.
>> Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.(CORRECT) 
Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The sing er performed hiphop and rock genre.
>> Actually, I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. The last concert that I watched was when I went to the beer festival there were some famous singers invited to that festival to make people excited to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hip-hop and rock genres of music. 
The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
>> The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better in playing bowling than me. But one day I won the game! So I was extremely delighted that I had beaten him playing the bowling game. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124062 HOMEWORK: Some people think that facing challenges improves a... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124061 HOMEWORK: If you want to learn a foreign language which would be... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124060 HOMEWORK: It is sometimes suggested that certain ideas can only... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124059 My favorite musicians. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 873
124058 Homework (12/08) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 6
124057 i like meet many people. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124056 homework ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 0
124055 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 947
124054 clean ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124053 How often do you take a taxi? What type of transportation do you... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 881
124052 Do you enjoy learning how to use new technology? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 1703
124051 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 1
124050 Complete each phrase below by using one of the prepositions from... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 795
124049 4 sentences ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124048 The importance of asking polite ÀÓ*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 843
124047 abduction ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 735
124046 it\'s only natural that an excellent coach from another country... ±è*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 768
124045 The friends for teenagers ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 1
124044 Where is the best place to eat in your town? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 2
124043 12/7 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-12-08 757

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04