¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*¹Î
2022-12-12 1200

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Helen, 
Thank you for making an essay. Your sentences are good and meaningful.  However, you have to be more aware of your grammatical errors and pronunciation lapses as well as you need to be careful with appropriate word usage and some articles in your sentences. Keep improving.  ~ Teacher QUENNY.. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.
>> Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.(CORRECT) 
Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The sing er performed hiphop and rock genre.
>> Actually, I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. The last concert that I watched was when I went to the beer festival there were some famous singers invited to that festival to make people excited to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hip-hop and rock genres of music. 
The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
>> The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better in playing bowling than me. But one day I won the game! So I was extremely delighted that I had beaten him playing the bowling game. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Please tell me something about the last concert you watched / Tell me about the recent sport you played. Tell me in as much detail as you can about the game.

Actually I don¡¯t enjoy going to see concerts. So the last concert that I saw was when I went to the beer festival there were sone famous singers invited to that festival to make people exciting to enjoy the festival. The singer performed hiphop and rock genre.

The recent sport I played was bowling with my husband. Normally my husband does better than me. But on that day I have won the game! So it was extremely delightful that I had beat him. We actually bet the game fee before playing and because I won the game, I was able to play it for free.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
124102 When you do local or international trips, who do you usually go... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 1
124101 Is there a place that you would never go to? Why? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 1
124100 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 630
124099 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 590
124098 Do you plan your day or take it as it comes? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 0
124097 Do you agree with the statement, ¡°Rejection can make us... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 1
124096 How do you reject something in a polite way? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 2
124095 Car insurance can be expensive and in some countries the number... Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 2
124094 Why do we judge women by their appearance more than men? Àü*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-11 1
124093 Need ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-10 2
124092 Homework ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-10 571
124091 Conversation at a coffee shop ¹Ú*¸í ¿Ï·á 2022-12-10 804
124090 Should students be required to wear school uniforms? Why or why... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-10 1302
124089 Use the following words in creative sentences ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-12-10 850
124088 homework ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 801
124087 Homework ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 2
124086 HOMEWORK: Make a sentence for each of the words: 1. large 2.... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 1
124085 Homework (12/09) ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 4
124084 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 0
124083 The life without mobile phone ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-12-09 1153

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04