¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-19 491

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their futures.
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try to the death.
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"

Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Ms. Eunice! ^^Thanks for your opinion. Actually in my country, parents usually tell their children to study hard because they cannot inherit anything from their parents but good education. Sometimes, when children are already grown ups, it's like "it's pay back time!" hahaha! Like they have to work and support their parents, by this time, it's the other way around. Parents would stop working and grown-up children would be the one to work for their family. Does it sound fairness? Hehehe
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
>>> The message is very true to children who have many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their future.
>>> CORRECT
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
>>> But if the elderly are told that message, I don't think that they will assent to the message.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
>>> CORRECT
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try until death.
>>> CORRECT
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
>>> We often face the limits and we are disappointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
>>> In Korea, we have a saying that goes:
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"
>>> 
" You are in pain and hurt because you are young"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
>>> Are you in pain? You must be the younger one. hihihihi
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117431 What is your favorite place? Why? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1
117430 Do you prefer reading, listening, speaking, or writing lessons?... Àü*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 462
117429 What are your weaknesses? Explain in detail. Ȳ*º° ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 203
117428 Do you prefer spending time with family or friends? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1078
117427 What is the most interesting hobby in your family? ½Å*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 594
117426 Writing Task(Mar 15th, 2022) ³²*½Â ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 346
117425 Use each expression in a sentence ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 844
117424 Who is your favorite book character? ¼Û*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 917
117423 Thank you! Donna! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 586
117422 Good evening! °­*ÀÌ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 675
117421 Because of this situation ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 797
117420 My Homeowrk °­*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 415
117419 Brushing ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 10
117418 Mama\'s boy ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 1
117417 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 145
117416 Favorite book character ¼Û*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 553
117415 How do you see yourself 10 years from now? ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 128
117414 What do you do to avoid catching COVID-19? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 357
117413 Wednesday Homework ·ù*¿ì ÁøÇàÁß 2022-03-16 396
117412 About computers controlling the house. ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 124

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04