¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Hi Gemmar

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*Áø
2022-07-19 490

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: In some cultures, children are often told that they can achieve anything if they try hard enough. What are the advantages and disadvantages of giving children this message?

The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their futures.
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try to the death.
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"

Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there Ms. Eunice! ^^Thanks for your opinion. Actually in my country, parents usually tell their children to study hard because they cannot inherit anything from their parents but good education. Sometimes, when children are already grown ups, it's like "it's pay back time!" hahaha! Like they have to work and support their parents, by this time, it's the other way around. Parents would stop working and grown-up children would be the one to work for their family. Does it sound fairness? Hehehe
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
The message are very proper to children who has many years to live.
>>> The message is very true to children who have many years to live.
It will encourage children to do their best in learning for their future.
>>> CORRECT
But If the elderly are told that masseage, I don't think that they assent the massege.
>>> But if the elderly are told that message, I don't think that they will assent to the message.
Children will learn naturally that they cannot achieve anything even they try hard.
>>> CORRECT
As you know, there are so much things in this world which we cannot achieve even though we try until death.
>>> CORRECT
We often face to the limits and we are dissapointed with the results we tried to get.
>>> We often face the limits and we are disappointed with the results we tried to get.
In korea we have a saying.
>>> In Korea, we have a saying that goes:
" You are painful and hurted because you are the young"
>>> 
" You are in pain and hurt because you are young"
Are you painful? you must young one. hihihihi
>>> Are you in pain? You must be the younger one. hihihihi
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
117451 I would appreciate it if you could check the sentence below. ½Å*±³ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 529
117450 If you can learn another language, what would it be and why? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 2
117449 Why Fintech? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 781
117448 High Hopes ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 602
117447 Biggest goal in my life À±*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 285
117446 What are your weaknesses? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 617
117445 If you can change something in the past, what would it be? Share... ÀÌ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 718
117444 What do you have in your bucket list? Write 5 examples with... Àå*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2022-03-17 610
117443 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 2
117442 homework Á¤*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 208
117441 What should be avoided when traveling? ½Å*ÈÄ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 456
117440 When people are wealthy or successful, do they have a special... ¾ç*Àº ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 791
117439 What will video games be like in the future? ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 838
117438 Catfish Ȳ*±¸ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 441
117437 3/16 homwork ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 590
117436 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 0
117435 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 2
117434 What are your weaknesses? Explain in detail. ¿©*Áø ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 0
117433 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 0
117432 HOMEWORK ¹è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2022-03-16 419

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04