¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Thursday Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ·ù*¿ì
2022-07-14 1007

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q:What are the advantages of eating fast food?
A:One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Paul!

Thank you for doing your homework. :)

I understand that English could be really difficult.

But it only takes faith and confidence in yourself to perfect it.

You are a smart person and I know that with constant practice you will do great¡¦ ^_^

Xoxo,

T. Christina ^^

Here are my corrections for you:


One of the advantages of eating fast food is I can feel better.

>> One of the advantages of eating fast food is that I can feel better.
Many people says that fast foods are not that good at health but eating them sometimes are not that bad.

>> Many people say that fast foods are not that good for the health, but eating them sometimes are not that bad.
And most of fast foods are delicious so I can feel better.

>> Most fast foods are delicious so I can feel better when I eat them.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
118316 homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-19 82
118315 How do you feel about tests and examinations? Are they necessary? ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-19 1
118314 2022.4.17 Àü* ¿Ï·á 2022-04-19 133
118313 What do you know about OMAD or one meal a day? How is this... ¼­*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-19 0
118312 A stressful job with very high pay or a relaxing job with... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2022-04-19 164
118311 4/18 homework... ÀÌ*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 116
118310 How is our accent affected by our birthplace? ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 88
118309 Homework ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 4
118308 Is there a sport that you would like to try? ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 143
118307 Sent e-mail to my colleagues ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 1
118306 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 6
118305 My city doesn\'t have bookstore ÀÌ*³ª ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 218
118304 What quote cheers you up? Please tell me about it. ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 120
118303 Right? ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 2
118302 Homework ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 93
118301 homework ÀÌ*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 1
118300 Do you prefer relaxing weekends doing nothing or active ones?... ÅÂ*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 139
118299 If I could shop for free at one store... ¹Ú*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 139
118298 Advertisement ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 2
118297 What foods do you think are healthy? What foods do you think are... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2022-04-18 139

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04