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Why is celebrating kids' birthday parties essential for their growth and happiness?

오혜영/2025-06-13

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

In my thought, All kids have to know that they was born to be loved by everyone. Their birthday is a day for celebrating to check this reason out again. So, it is really excellent idea to celebrate someone's birth every years.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi Stella,

As always, thank you for taking the time to answer this essay. :)
I agree with you. I think it's wonderful that children feel loved on their special day.
I read an article about this and it said that celebrating a child’s birthday is important because it promotes social skills and creates lifelong memories.
I hope your son had a wonderful birthday! He'll definitely remember it forever.
Have a lovely weekend to you and your family! :)

- Teacher Elly~

In my thought, All kids have to know that they was born to be loved by everyone.

>> In my opinion, all children should know that they were born to be loved by everyone.

Their birthday is a day for celebrating to check this reason out again.
>> A birthday is a time to celebrate and remind them of this reason.

So, it is really excellent idea to celebrate someone's birth every years.

>> So, it is really an excellent idea to celebrate someone’s birthday every year.

OR >> Therefore, it is a wonderful idea to celebrate someone’s birth every year.