POWER ENGLISH

현재위치

> 영작교정 첨삭 서비스

When is immigration helpful to a country and when is harmful?

문가현/2025-03-20

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

Immigration is beneficial for the country seeking skilled labor force. Due to the low birth rate and decreasing population, many countries require labor force and run the country. This immigration also has an impact of increasing the population because workers usually bring in their family. Therefore, many countries accept immigration for skilled and non-skilled labor. For instance, the UK benefit immigration of IT workers to catch up with Asia and US. Also, Korea accepts immigration for a low skilled workforce to fill the loophole. On the other hand, immigration can have a negative impact on society when they need to adapt to different culture and religion. Different religion entails different habit and practices which can lead to the discrimination. For example, in South Korea increasing Muslim population has increased the number of mosques. However, when there are attempt to build mosque, there are huge protest because it is regarded as unpleasant facilities due to misunderstanding.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Aciel!

Immigration is beneficial for the country seeking skilled labor force.

>>> Immigration is beneficial for the country seeking a skilled labor force.

Due to the low birth rate and decreasing population, many countries require labor force and run the country.

>>> Due to the low birth rate and decreasing population, many countries require labor force to run the country.

This immigration also has an impact of increasing the population because workers usually bring in their families.

>>> correct

Therefore, many countries accept immigration for skilled and non-skilled labor.

>>> correct

For instance, the UK benefit immigration of IT workers to catch up with Asia and US.

>>> For instance, the UK benefits from the immigration of IT workers to catch up with Asia and the US.

Also, Korea accepts immigration for a low-skilled workforce to fill the loophole.

>>> correct

On the other hand, immigration can have a negative impact on society when they need to adapt to different culture and religion.

>>> OR: On the other hand, immigration can hurt/harm society when they need to adapt to different cultures and religions.

Different religion entails different habit and practices which can lead to the discrimination.

>>> Different religions entail different habits and practices which can lead to discrimination.

For example, in South Korea increasing Muslim population has increased the number of mosques.

>>> correct

However, when there are attempt to build mosque, there are huge protest because it is regarded as unpleasant facilities due to misunderstanding.

>>> However, when there are attempts to build mosques, there are huge protests because it is regarded as unpleasant facilities due to misunderstanding.