Homework4
김건/2025-02-16
회원님의 올려주신 영작문
My grandparents used to run a small market. When I was a child, I love to go to my grandparents market, becuase I could eat all the snacks for free. They allowed me to eat snacks that I want. Once in really warm summer, I brought one ice cream and went out. That ice cream was my favourite one. I closed my eyes and tried to lick it one time while I was walking. Then I heard the sound which is someone try to hold back laughter. I was thinking like "What is he laughing for?" and I passed by him. After then, I knew my ice cream was gone. It was on the gournd already. I just held the cone. Actually he was laughing for falling down my ice cream. I was crying somehow, it was a big embarrassing moment for a child. The good thing was my grandmother gave me a new one. Even though it was a long time ago, I still remember this situation. haha
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hi, Geon^^
I believe most kids experienced some embarrassing things.
It's pretty normal especially for kids.
Thank you for sharing that memory. ^^
_T. SHAY^^
***
My grandparents used to run a small market.
>>Correct
OR: My grandparents ran a small market years ago.
When I was a child, I love to go to my grandparents market, becuase I could eat all the snacks for free.
>>When I was a child, I loved to go to my grandparents' store/shop because I could eat all the snacks for free.
They allowed me to eat snacks that I want.
>>They allowed me to eat the snacks that I want.OR: They let me eat the snacks I want.
Once in really warm summer, I brought one ice cream and went out.
>>One warm summer day, I got one ice cream and went out.
That ice cream was my favourite one.
>>Correct
OR: The ice cream I had at that time was my favorite.
I closed my eyes and tried to lick it one time while I was walking.
>>Correct
OR: While I was walking, I tried licking it with my eyes closed.
Then I heard the sound which is someone try to hold back laughter.
>>Then, I heard someone trying to hold back his laughter.
I was thinking like "What is he laughing for?" and I passed by him.
>>Correct
OR: I thought, "What is he laughing about"? and I continued walking.
After then, I knew my ice cream was gone.
>>After that, I realized my ice cream was gone.
It was on the gournd already.
>>It was on the ground.
OR: It fell on the ground.
I just held the cone.
>>Correct
OR: I was just holding the cone.
Actually he was laughing for falling down my ice cream. >>Actually, he was laughing about my ice cream that fell.
I was crying somehow, it was a big embarrassing moment for a child.
>>Then I cried. It was the most embarrassing moment for a kid.
The good thing was my grandmother gave me a new one.
>>Correct
OR: Fortunately, my grandmother gave me a new one.
Even though it was a long time ago, I still remember this situation. haha
>>Correct
OR: It may have been a long time, but I still remember it clearly.