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차진혁/2025-02-06

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

I think money can make people happy because if youhave it, you can do what you want. But, many money can gambling.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Here's your corrected composition, Jimmy. Please go over the revisions given below. See you soon!

Cheers,

Jean~~

Do you think money can make people happy?

I think money can make people happy because if you have it, you can do what you want.

>> I think money can make people happy because you can do what you want if you have it.

But, many money can gambling.

>> But some people have a habit of gambling if they have a lot of money.