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I want to purchase my own house one day.

김창민/2024-11-07

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

Now I live in my parent's house, but I have a dream that I possess my own house when I'm in forty. I think I have to be independent from my parents when I'm get older. But I have to pay almost two hundred fifty thousand(250,000) dollars to purchase house in my hometown. It cost a fortune to me now, but I want to possess my own house 10 years later.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi there again, Min!

I am so proud of your dream to own a house! I know this is possible with your hard work and dedication to your work. Since you can get some benefits from the government, you would better take advantage of the house loan or housing benefits available.

Below, there are some underlined words that you can use to make your sentences even better. Great job!

See you.

-T. Donna~

Now I live in my parent's house, but I have a dream that I possess my own house when I'm in forty.

>> Now I live in my parent's house, but I have a dream to possess my own house when I'm forty.

I think I have to be independent from my parents when I'm get older.

>> I think I have to be independent from my parents when I get older.

But I have to pay almost two hundred fifty thousand(250,000) dollars to purchase house in my hometown.

>> Correct!

It cost a fortune to me now, but I want to possess my own house 10 years later.

>> It costs a fortune for me now, but I want to possess my own house 10 years later.