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류건우/2024-07-08

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
Q: Why do you think it's necessary to have salary raise or bonus? A: I think it's because every people always get more greedy. I think most people tend to get more greedy everyday, because they have a lot of things they want to do, and they need money for that. Also, I think it's necessary because they need more money by the time go.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hi, Paul! 

Thank you for doing your homework.

~T. Divina^^

Here are some corrections:

1. I think it's because every people always get more greedy.
>>I think it's because every person always gets greedier.

2. I think most people tend to get more greedy everyday, because they have a lot of things they want to do, and they need money for that.
>>I think most people tend to get greedier every day, because they want to do a lot of things that need money.

3. Also, I think it's necessary because they need more money by the time go.
>>Also, I think it's necessary because they need more money by the time goes.

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