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Poor person's being successful

양기연/2024-06-25

회원님의 올려주신 영작문

According to an article, it is nearly impossible to move to higher positions in capitalism societies. But there are a few cases of vertical move. I think the best way is through higher education. Graduating from a good university and getting a professional job like a doctor gives a poor person an opportunity to be successful.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Gi Yean!

I totally agree with you! Although it is hard for poor people to become successful, there are still many success stories where they were able to overcome adversity and improve their situation. Just take note of the last sentence, I just added a comma before "like being a doctor" to make the sentence clearer.

-T. Caitlyn

According to an article, it is nearly impossible to move to higher positions in capitalism societies.

>> CORRECT

But there are a few cases of vertical move.

>> CORRECT

I think the best way is through higher education.

>> CORRECT

Graduating from a good university and getting a professional job like a doctor gives a poor person an opportunity to be successful.

>> Graduating from a good university and getting a professional job, like being a doctor, gives a poor person an opportunity to be successful.