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김순님/2024-06-25

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
I agree to exist the death penalty. People who commit crime against the law have to be afraid of result. Generous punishment is caused by another hideous crimes . These days people kill others easily although they are normal people. This situation is came from insensitivity of crimes and its punishments.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hello there, Ms. Sunny!
The effectiveness of the death penalty in solving a crime is still in process. My thoughts remain on the worst punishment that I mentioned before.
Thank you for giving your thoughts here. Enjoy the day!
Aki~

I agree to exist the death penalty.
>>> I agree that the death penalty will exist again.

People who commit crime against the law have to be afraid of result.
>>> People who commit crimes against the law have to be afraid of results.

Generous punishment is caused by another hideous crimes .
>>> Generous punishment is caused by other hideous crimes.

These days people kill others easily although they are normal people.
>>> CORRECT!
OR >>> These days,  people kill others easily even without the intention.

This situation is came from insensitivity of crimes and its punishments.
>>> This situation came from the insensitivity of crimes and their punishments.
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