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Generally, what do kids in Korea want to be when they grow up? Explain your answer.

차유진/2024-06-16

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
Generally, boys want to be police officer and YouTube creater when they grow up, girls want to be designer and idol when they grow up in Korea. It maybe they think police officer is cool and right, YouTube creater is funny and rich, designer is charming, idol is pretty
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hello again, Yale!

Here's your edited composition. Many thanks for sending it. Please read the corrections made below. Enjoy your evening there! 


Cheers,
Jean~~




                Generally, what do kids in Korea want to be when they grow up? Explain your answer.


Generally, boys want to be police officer and YouTube creater when they grow up, girls want to be designer and idol when they grow up in Korea.
>> Generally, boys want to be police officers and YouTube content creators when they grow up whereas girls want to be designers and idols when they grow up in Korea.

It maybe they think police officer is cool and right, YouTube creater is funny and rich, designer is charming, idol is pretty
>> Maybe they think being a police officer is cool and right, being a YouTube creator is fun and rich, being a designer is charming, and being an idol is pretty. 
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