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Writing Task: What opinion would you present at a meeting about the government prohibiting cell phon

김일환/2024-06-06

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
If I were to have a debate on the subject. I would gather base data. Youtube has lots of data about it. There was a TV show about using cell phone while driving. If a driver uses a cell phone, his reaction takes longer than if he doesn't use it. The majority of cars have handsfree system. So, drivers don't need to control cell phones while driving. My opinion is that, drivers allow to access cell phones as much as the car has functions.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Great work, Hwanny! Thank you for sharing your thoughts. See you in class!
- Teacher Angela


If I were to have a debate on the subject. I would gather base data. 
>> If I were to have a debate on the subject, I would gather basic data.

Youtube has lots of data about it. 
>> CORRECT

There was a TV show about using cell phone while driving. 
>> There was a TV show about the dangers of using a cell phone while driving.

If a driver uses a cell phone, his reaction takes longer than if he doesn't use it. 
>>If a driver uses a cell phone, their reaction time is longer compared to when they don't use it.

The majority of cars have handsfree system. 
>> CORRECT

So, drivers don't need to control cell phones while driving. 
>> Drivers should refrain from using cell phones while driving.

My opinion is that, drivers allow to access cell phones as much as the car has functions.
>> In my opinion, drivers should be allowed to access cell phones to the extent that the car has functions.
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