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김순님/2024-05-15

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
I think The teacher should advice the students to find out their own ability. Students have to distinguish what they want to do or what they can do well. Many different jobs should be showned to students. Most of all, Students have to enjoy their school life among the people. So teacher need to help students to adjust it.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Great day, Ms. Sunny!
I agree with you. I don't know if your country considers that teachers are the second parents of children because they (students) spend time mostly in school. That's the reason why teachers have a big role in molding a student's character while they are growing in this real world.
Aki~

I think The teacher should advice the students to find out their own ability.
>>> I think the teacher should advise and guide the students to find out their abilities.

Students have to distinguish what they want to do or what they can do well.
>>> CORRECT!
OR>>> The students need to discern between their desires and their strengths

Many different jobs should be showned to students.
>>> Many different jobs should be shown to students.

Most of all, Students have to enjoy their school life among the people.
>>> Most of all, students have to enjoy their school life among the people.

So teacher need to help students to adjust it.
>>> So the teacher needs to help students to adjust.

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