영작교정 첨삭 서비스

현재위치

Home > 영작교정 첨삭 서비스

homework 04.29

최 건/2024-04-29

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
~ Writing Task: Please answer the question: What are your opinions about parkour? I have seen someone play parkour in the park or on the street. First thing I thought that they were unique people. This is because at that time parkour is unfamiliar sports in my country. And it's seems like easily injuries exercise. However, these days, different before, increased interest of parkour and competitions held in my country. But, sometimes there are people who go over the unique and take on reckless challenges. For example, they did jumping between buildings and moving or skip the subway platform use the parkour. In addition, they show off their dangerous post up loading on social media. This is to use promote them through dangerous post. These actions can harms others and kill their life. And I think this way is stupid.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hi, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are your opinions about parkour?

I have seen someone play parkour in the park or on the street.
>> CORRECT!
First thing I thought that they were unique people.
>> First thing I thought was that they were unique people.
This is because at that time parkour is unfamiliar sports in my country.
>> This is because at that time parkour is an unfamiliar sport in my country.
And it's seems like easily injuries exercise.
>> And it's seems like we are prone to injuries.
However, these days, different before, increased interest of parkour and competitions held in my country.
>> However, these days, different than before, people have increased their interest in parkour and competitions held in my country.
But, sometimes there are people who go over the unique and take on reckless challenges.
>> CORRECT!
For example, they did jumping between buildings and moving or skip the subway platform use the parkour.
>> For example, they jump between buildings and move or skip the subway platforms by doing parkour tricks.
In addition, they show off their dangerous post up loading on social media.
>> In addition, they show off their dangerous posts uploaded on social media.
This is to use promote them through dangerous post.
>> This is to promote themselves through a dangerous post.
These actions can harms others and kill their life.
>> These actions can harm others and take their own lives.
And I think this way is stupid.
>> CORRECT!

이전글 목록 다음글