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Have you ever been to a farm? Write about it.

차진혁/2024-04-23

회원님의 올려주신 영작문
Yes,I have been to a farm many times. When I was in kindergarten I went to a farm experience. And when I went on a trip with my family I have been to a farm. For example, animal farm, fruit farm,vegetable farm.
강사님의 첨삭교정 내용
Hello there, Jimmy!


Here's your edited homework and thanks for sending it. Please note the alternative phrases and expressions used and also the punctuation marks (comma). 
Also, note how I changed the sequence of the clauses in your sentences. Good night! 


Cheers,
Jean~~




                                           Have you ever been to a farm? Write about it.


Yes, I have been to a farm many times.
>> OR: Yes, I have and I've visited a farm several times. 

When I was in kindergarten I went to a farm experience.
>> When I was in kindergarten, I went to a farm experience program. 
>> OR: I went to a farm experience program when I was in kindergarten. 

And when I went on a trip with my family I have been to a farm.
>> And when I went on a trip with my family, I visited a farm.
>> OR: I visited a farm when I went on a trip with my family. 

For example, animal farm, fruit farm,vegetable farm.
>> For example, I went to an animal farm, a fruit farm, and a vegetable farm.



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