¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the implication of having an aging population?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*¸í
2025-04-16 18

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, there are two reasons.
First, these days medical technology is developed than the past.
It can be fix most disease that people be ill. People just go to hospital when they are sick.
Second, there are not the situation that people are threatened with their life like war or starvation than the past.
Because of these reasons, aging population is increasing continues.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you So Myeong!

In my opinion, there are two reasons.
>>>   correct
First, these days medical technology is developed than the past.
>>>   First, these days, medical technology is more developed than in the past.
It can be fix most disease that people be ill. 
>>>   It can mostly cure and treat diseases when people are ill.
People just go to hospital when they are sick.
>>> correct   
Second, there are not the situation that people are threatened with their life like war or starvation than the past.
>>>  Second, there are no situations which people are threatened with their lives like war or starvation as in the past. 
Because of these reasons, aging population is increasing continues.
>>>   Because of these reasons, the aging population is continuously increasing.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
143645 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 1
143644 homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 1
143643 How can a company attract talented employees? À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 20
143642 How has Holy Week changed over time? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 1
143641 In what situations would you use the phrase \"Let¡¯s call it a... ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 24
143640 4/14 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 23
143639 4/14 ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 19
143638 0414 IELTS writing Task2 homework ¼Û*À¯ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 1
143637 Change speedily ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 23
143636 What is important thing ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 23
143635 Bad sleeping ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 18
143634 Do well ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 17
143633 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 19
143632 2025.04.15 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 17
143631 Have you ever felt that painting takes too much time and effort? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 22
143630 Do you think climate change is making wildfires worse? Why or... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 15
143629 Why do so many people love traveling? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 20
143628 What\'s the most exciting musical instrument to play? Why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 25
143627 Homework for today ¾ö*¸° ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 3
143626 2 Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-15 27

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04