무료 레벨테스트 받고 강사평가 남기면 1,OOO원 쿠폰 즉시 적립!

혹시 사이트에선 찾지 못한 궁금한 점이 있으세요?
남겨주신 이메일을 통해 답변 드리겠습니다.

문의하신 내용이 문자로 발송되오니
연락처를 남겨주세요.
업무시간 월~금 오전9시~오후6시
(점심시간 낮12시~오후1시)

영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

Does Korea rely too much on the U.S. for trade and defense?

작성자: 노*철
2025-04-11 73

회원님의 영작문

Many countries are getting help from the United States on trade and defense issues.
Both the EU and Japan depend on the United States.
We depend on the military power of the United States, and we also have to rely on the United States to trade with the big market of the United States.
But it is possible because the interests of the United States and other countries are compatible.
The United States has controlled other countries with its own great power.
Although Korea's military power has risen to an enormous level, it is not possible to develop missiles that can fly more than 300 kilometers due to U.S. control.
The same goes for nuclear weapons.
If we want to use high-level weapons, the United States tells us not to develop but to buy our own weapons at a high price.
Instead, American soldiers stay in South Korea to prevent North Korea's invasion.
Everything involves this economic logic.
This is because when we help poor countries, there are benefits we can gain from helping them.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi David. Your writing brings up meaningful points about international alliances and the balance of power, especially between South Korea and the United States. You show an awareness of the complex dynamics in global politics and economics. With just a few grammatical refinements, your thoughts become clearer and more persuasive. Keep exploring and expressing your opinions as your perspective reflects strong critical thinking.


~ T. Lia


Many countries are getting help from the United States on trade and defense issues.
>> Many countries receive support from the United States in areas such as trade and defense.


Both the EU and Japan depend on the United States.
>> Both the European Union and Japan rely on the United States.


We depend on the military power of the United States, and we also have to rely on the United States to trade with the big market of the United States.
>> We rely on the military power of the United States, and we also depend on them for access to their large market in trade.


But it is possible because the interests of the United States and other countries are compatible.
>> This relationship is possible because the interests of the United States and other countries align.


The United States has controlled other countries with its own great power.
>> The United States has exerted control over other countries through its significant power.


Although Korea's military power has risen to an enormous level, it is not possible to develop missiles that can fly more than 300 kilometers due to U.S. control.
>> Although Korea's military strength has grown significantly, it is still restricted from developing missiles with a range over 300 kilometers due to U.S. regulations.


The same goes for nuclear weapons.
>> The same restriction applies to nuclear weapons.


If we want to use high-level weapons, the United States tells us not to develop but to buy our own weapons at a high price.
>> If we want to use advanced weapons, the United States advises us not to develop them independently but to purchase them at high prices.


Instead, American soldiers stay in South Korea to prevent North Korea's invasion.
>> In return, American soldiers are stationed in South Korea to help deter a potential invasion by North Korea.


Everything involves this economic logic.
>> All of this operates within a framework of economic logic.


This is because when we help poor countries, there are benefits we can gain from helping them.
>> This is similar to how aiding poorer countries often leads to mutual benefits.


번호 제목 글쓴이 공개 상태 등록일 조회수
143368 Homework 김*우 완료 2025-04-01 1
143367 What are the good points of working under rushed conditions? 이*훈 완료 2025-04-01 132
143366 What did you do last weekend? 최*희 완료 2025-04-01 113
143365 What is the tallest building you have visited? 진*호 완료 2025-04-01 2
143364 Do you think flexible working hours are beneficial? Why or why... 윤*인 완료 2025-04-01 2
143363 HOMEWORK: What thing will you not give to anyone? why? 이*희 완료 2025-04-01 114
143362 Do you ever think that some music is just noise? 양*정 완료 2025-04-01 2
143361 What meal would you prepare for a guest from another country? 양*정 완료 2025-04-01 1
143360 What is your idea of the best travel experience? 조*명 완료 2025-04-01 5
143359 What meal would you prepare for a guest from another country? 권*진 완료 2025-04-01 1
143358 weak 민*정 완료 2025-04-01 1
143357 What is the deepest part of the ocean? What can we find there? 차*혁 완료 2025-04-01 121
143356 never 민*정 완료 2025-04-01 2
143355 past 민*정 완료 2025-04-01 1
143354 What factors influence a career choice? 임* 완료 2025-04-01 2
143353 What is the most environmentally friendly form of... 김*환 완료 2025-04-01 1
143352 Where is it best to do some workout ? 박*호 완료 2025-04-01 143
143351 Homework 박*준 완료 2025-04-01 134
143350 2025.03.31 homework! 이*준 완료 2025-04-01 140
143349 gap 권*희 완료 2025-04-01 132

HOW TO USE IT?

[마이페이지 > 수업 내용 보기 > 학습 캘린더 > 영작교정 버튼 클릭]

수업 횟수만큼 영작교정 게시판이 생성되며,
지난 날짜에도 게시 할 수 있습니다.

주5회 수업 : 월 20회 이용 가능
주3회 수업 : 월 12회 이용 가능
주2회 수업 : 월 08회 이용 가능
01
교정 내용은 최대 1,000byte까지 올릴 수 있습니다.

첨부 파일은 원활한 첨삭을 위한 참고자료로 사용될 뿐,
파일에 대한 첨삭은 불가능 합니다.

업로드 가능한 첨부 파일은 최대 2mb까지이며,
첨부 할 수 있는 파일 형식은 다음과 같습니다.

문서 - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
이미지 - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
전문 분야를 제외한 회원님이 직접 작성한 글만
첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
하루 게시 가능한 글은 3회까지 이며,
종료된 수업의 영작교정 게시판은
이용이 어려운 점 양해 부탁 드립니다.
04

와이즈에듀케이션아이(주) 사이트명: 파워잉글리쉬 대표이사 전상현
사업자등록번호: 217-81-44736 통신판매신고번호: 2014-서울도봉-0233호
서울본사: 서울시 노원구 한글비석로 245 두타빌 B동 7층 713호
대표번호 1688-8672 개인정보관리 책임자: 안희영 [powerenglish@pweng.net]