¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¹Î
2025-04-04 101

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

What are some reasons why privacy is important for you?

A: There are some reasons why privacy is important for me. First, I love my own free time that I can rest alone and I can fully get energy and heal my mind during the time. I often run out of my energy to maintain my relationship. So privacy is really important for me! And since I have some secrets that I want to hide from anyone, I don¡¯t want to reveal my diary or kakao talk.Sometimes I wrote my thoughts about my friends and my family. I can reduce stress by writing my honest emotions

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Yumin

A very exciting day to you! Thank you so much in submitting your homework.

Keep practicing on your grammar and you'll see that you'll have improvements that you don't even notice at all. ^^

See you in our class! Sweet day!

-T.Jeny


There are some reasons why privacy is important for me. 
>>There are some reasons why privacy is important to me. 
First, I love my own free time that I can rest alone and I can fully get energy and heal my mind during the time.
>>First, I love my free time, when I can rest alone, gain full energy, and heal my mind.
 I often run out of my energy to maintain my relationship. 
>> I often run out of energy to maintain my relationship. 
So privacy is really important for me!
>>So privacy is really important to me!
 And since I have some secrets that I want to hide from anyone, I don¡¯t want to reveal my diary or kakao talk.
>>Correct
Sometimes I wrote my thoughts about my friends and my family. 
>>Correct
I can reduce stress by writing my honest emotions
>>Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
143417 What is a good leader for you? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 1
143416 HOMEWORK 4/3 ±è*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 110
143415 Do you think visiting another country can change the way people... ¿©*Âù ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 2
143414 What are your thoughts on vegetarians? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 119
143413 Please tell me sentence example! ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 0
143412 Homework ±è*º° ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 4
143411 homework ÀÌ*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 109
143410 250402_ Homework Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 112
143409 s Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 114
143408 4/3 homework À±*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 112
143407 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 110
143406 Are you comfortable giving constructive criticism to your... À±*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 1
143405 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 2
143404 How convenient is public transportation in your city? Can you... Á¶*¸í ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 2
143403 What advice would you give to someone struggling with... ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 125
143402 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 109
143401 Homework ÇÑ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 1
143400 2025.04.02 homework! ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 109
143399 phobia ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 0
143398 How did you feel about your performance overall? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-04-03 110

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04