¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What did you all talk about while having brunch?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-03-25 226

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Totally there were seven people at my mother's birthday party. (My first sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and our couple.)
My little sister has no children.
Our story topics are really diverse.
We talked a lot about life, such as our hobbies and our work life, as well as about diet and skin care, and about celebrities.
The story of my family that we always talk about is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.
My mother likes to hear from Kylie and Nikki a lot.
While eating shabu-shabu, we all had video calls with Kylie and Nikki.
There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the face of the person we want to see.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello David, your writing effectively captures the warmth of a family gathering! I made some adjustments for clarity and natural flow, especially in phrasing and sentence structure. Keep up the great work. You¡¯re doing well in expressing emotions through writing!

~ T. Lia

Totally there were seven people at my mother's birthday party.
>> In total, there were seven people at my mother¡¯s birthday party.

(My first sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and our couple.)
>> (My eldest sister and her 25-year-old son, my younger sister and her husband, and my husband and me.)

My little sister has no children.
>> My younger sister has no children.

Our story topics are really diverse.
>> We talked about a wide variety of topics.

We talked a lot about life, such as our hobbies and our work life, as well as about diet and skin care, and about celebrities.
>> We had many conversations about life, including our hobbies, work, diet, skincare, and celebrities.

The story of my family that we always talk about is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.
>> A topic that always comes up in our family is the story of two daughters studying in the United States.

My mother likes to hear from Kylie and Nikki a lot.
>> My mother loves hearing from Kylie and Nikki.

While eating shabu-shabu, we all had video calls with Kylie and Nikki.
>> While enjoying shabu-shabu, we all had a video call with Kylie and Nikki.

There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the face of the person we want to see.
>> There is nothing more enjoyable than seeing the faces of our loved ones.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142810 gym ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-02 0
142809 If i can choose past or future of 10 years.. ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2025-03-02 508
142808 What are some famous foods from your hometown? Á¶*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-02 426
142807 Do you think holidays are too commercialized? ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-02 586
142806 Some companies use a flexible time schedule and employees can... ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-01 474
142805 What kind of food do you not like? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-03-01 1
142804 Have you ever heard about the MZ Generation before? What do you... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-03-01 2
142803 How important is customer service in a restaurant? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 411
142802 Describe your ideal supermarket. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 564
142801 Annoying requests È«*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 477
142800 So nice winter break ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 2
142799 Describe a wolf. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 540
142798 homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 495
142797 Who do you usually go to restaurants with? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 1
142796 In what ways can tourism help improve a country\'s... °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 1
142795 Do you enjoy pairing coffee with a specific type of food or... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 512
142794 What is the most interesting part of learning English ? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 490
142793 Learning English from a native speaker ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 558
142792 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 0
142791 What characteristics have you inherited from your parents? Do... ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-28 576

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04