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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

How can extreme weather conditions affect the economy and our social life ?

작성자: 박*호
2025-03-17 136

회원님의 영작문

I thought that extreme weather means scorching hot or freezing cold before the class today.
But you told me in the morning that it means storms, flood and something like that.
I think scorching hot or freezing cold have a negative effect on the economy.
Moreover, I think natural disasters such as typhoons and floods definitely have a more negative impact on the economy than scorching hot or freezing cold
In addition, residents who have lost their homes due to them have to live in temporary shelters elsewhere for a long time and pay a lot of money to repair destroyed roads or homes.
Natural disasters such as storms also damage crops, leading to food shortages and higher grain prices.
As you know, I come from the countryside. When I was young, typhoons that originated in the Philippines would hit the southern part of Korea every summer, and I saw it with my own eyes.
I hope natural disasters don't happen anymore.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Soon Ho^^
Thank you for sharing.
Well, scorching hot weather and freezing cold weather are also considered extreme weather actually. 
However, the reason why I asked you to have it as your homework is because 
you were not able to explain your answer well. 
Also, in your answer you mentioned holidays. And I didn't understand how holidays are related
with extreme weather.
_T. SHAY^^
***
I thought that extreme weather means scorching hot or freezing cold before the class today.
>>Correct
OR: I thought scorching hot and freezing cold weather are examples of extreme weather.
But you told me in the morning that it means storms, flood and something like that.
>>Correct
OR: However, you mentioned in class that some examples are storms and other natural disasters.
I think scorching hot or freezing cold have a negative effect on the economy.
>>Correct
OR: I think extremely hot and extremely cold weather have a negative effect on the economy.
Moreover, I think natural disasters such as typhoons and floods definitely have a more negative impact on the economy than scorching hot or freezing cold
>>Moreover, I think natural disasters such as typhoons and floods definitely have a more negative impact on the economy than the extremely hot and cold weather.
In addition, residents who have lost their homes due to them have to live in temporary shelters elsewhere for a long time and pay a lot of money to repair destroyed roads or homes.
>>Correct
OR: Additionally, people who lose their homes due to typhoons have to live in evacuation centers elsewhere for a long time and even spend a lot of money to repair or reconstruct their houses.
Natural disasters such as storms also damage crops, leading to food shortages and higher grain prices.
>>Correct
OR: Natural calamities like storms also destroy crops leading to food shortages and higher food prices.
As you know, I come from the countryside. 
>>Correct
OR: As you already know, I was raised in the countryside.
When I was young, typhoons that originated in the Philippines would hit the southern part of Korea every summer, and I saw it with my own eyes.
>>Correct
OR: When I was young, typhoons from the Philippines hit the southern part of Korea every summer. I experienced those back then. 
I hope natural disasters don't happen anymore.
>>I hope natural disasters stop happening.
OR: I hope there are no more natural disasters.

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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
완료 되는 것을 원칙으로 하고 있습니다.
03
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