¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The homework of 14th Fab.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¶*È£
2025-03-14 415

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q : Can you think of a time when you stood by someone-or someone stood by you-through thick and thin? What was the situation, and how did it affect your relationship? Describe your experience in detail.

A : Yes. The People who stood by me thick and thin are my mother and grand mother.
When i was young, my parents divorced.
So, i lived with my grand mother. She dedicated to care me and younger brother.
Although we was poor, she tried to do her best to us. So we can be grown well. I am missing her.
Also, my mother always care and help us by giving money, attending events in school and so on.
By the efforts of them, we can be grown well.
I could feel safe always due to love of them.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Eddy!

This is such a heartfelt and touching essay. Thank you for sharing such an important part of your life. It feels so nice to read your writing, and I can feel the love and gratitude you have for your mother and grandmother.

Your story shows how strong and caring they were for you and your younger brother, even when life was difficult. It¡¯s truly inspiring how they stood by you, making sure you were safe, cared for, and able to grow up well. The way you express your emotions makes your writing even more special.

Keep writing with this honesty and warmth, you¡¯re doing an amazing job!

~Teacher Cathy

 

Yes. The People who stood by me thick and thin are my mother and grand mother.

>>Yes. The people who stood by me through thick and thin were my mother and grandmother.

When I was young, my parents divorced.

>>CORRECT

OR>>When I was young, my parents separated.

So, i lived with my grand mother. She dedicated to care me and younger brother.

>>So, I lived with my grandmother. She dedicated herself to taking care of me and my younger brother.

Although we was poor, she tried to do her best to us. So we can be grown well. I am missing her.

>>Although we were poor, she did her best for us so that we could grow up well. I miss her.

Also, my mother always care and help us by giving money, attending events in school and so on.

>>Also, my mother always cared for and helped us by providing financial support, attending school events, and so on.

By the efforts of them, we can be grown well.

>>Because of their efforts, we were able to grow up well.

I could feel safe always due to love of them.

>>I always felt safe because of their love.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142214 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 1071
142213 Do you prefer a quick goodbye or a long farewell? Why? ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 802
142212 What surprised you about getting older? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-31 872
142211 Trump ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1381
142210 Write the best way to have a staycation during the Korean New... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 902
142209 What is your ideal summer camp? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1089
142208 Write about the most interesting summer camp you can think of. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 777
142207 How do you celebrate Seollal with your family? ÀÓ*ºñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1304
142206 Write about the first time you were on a plane. Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1135
142205 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1
142204 My introduction ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 3
142203 Write about your most recent dining experience. ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-30 1013
142202 nature ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-29 1
142201 Rice Terraces ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-29 1
142200 What\'s your ideal Korean New Year? Explain? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-28 942
142199 Do you think traditions should be preserved and maintained? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1546
142198 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1
142197 When something needs fixing or changing in your house, do you do... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 0
142196 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 1023
142195 How can transportation options be convenient or inconvenient? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-27 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04