¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What are your thoughts on power interruptions?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2025-03-11 114

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My thoughts power interruptions is scary because the power interruptions is dark so it is scary power interruption in my school four years ago.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your corrected composition, Yale!  Many thanks for sending it. Please take a look at the few revisions and alternative expressions provided.   


Cheers,
Jean~~



        

                          What are your thoughts on power interruptions?



My thoughts power interruptions is scary because the power interruptions is dark so it is scary power interruption in my school four years ago.
>> I think power interruptions are scary because it becomes dark without electricity. For example, there was a power interruption four years ago in my school and I was scared. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142744 What kind of food do you prefer having in the restaurant ? ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-26 255
142743 As a citizen, what would make you most satisfied with the... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-02-26 284
142742 Express my appreciation ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-26 258
142741 script Á¶*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-26 223
142740 Page 31 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-26 0
142739 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 1
142738 Summer vs Winter? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 269
142737 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 0
142736 What can you say about the behavior of the Koreans in the... ÀÌ*Áß ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 4
142735 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 1
142734 my ambitions ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 2
142733 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 208
142732 When I failed to follow plans È«*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 351
142731 What¡¯s your favorite English word? Why? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 267
142730 There\'s no problem to live without smartphone ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 2
142729 What are the things you wanted to experience at your age? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 3
142728 The homework for February 25th. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 277
142727 How do you return favors that others have done for you? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 280
142726 How can humidity levels impact sleep quality? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 1
142725 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-25 264

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04