¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2025-02-26 42

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think studying international news is a great thing. This is because by studying international news, we can know the international trend and make the right choices accordingly.
However, there are some people who do not think so. What we learn at school is basic. In other words, we learn the things that people need to live. Examples are math, science, society, and history. We can become better people by learning these basic studies.
There is nothing international about these basic studies. Rather, there are people who think that it can confuse students.
I disagree with that. International studies are necessary, and as I mentioned earlier, it is essential to read the flow well and make good choices.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~!^^ You did an excellent job establishing the context and clearly outlining the central theme of your essay. By presenting a thoughtful opening, you set a strong foundation for the argument that follows, making it easy for the reader to understand the direction of your analysis. The way you framed the issue not only engages but also encourages a deeper exploration of the topic in the body of the essay.
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think studying international news is a great thing.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
 This is because by studying international news, we can know the international trend and make the right choices accordingly.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
However, there are some people who do not think so.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
 What we learn at school is basic. 
>>>CORRECT~!^^
In other words, we learn the things that people need to live. 
>>>CORRECT~!^^
Examples are math, science, society, and history. 
>>>CORRECT~!^^
We can become better people by learning these basic studies.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
There is nothing international about these basic studies. 
>>>CORRECT~!^^
Rather, there are people who think that it can confuse students.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
I disagree with that. International studies are necessary, and as I mentioned earlier, it is essential to read the flow well and make good choices.
>>>CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142084 What was the most expensive gift you ever gave to someone? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 475
142083 What has surprised you when you¡¯ve met people from other... ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 448
142082 Discuss your earliest memory as a child. ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 398
142081 affect ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 395
142080 1/20 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 448
142079 Interacting with neighbors ÇÑ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 436
142078 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-21 415
142077 What do you do to wake yourself up when it\'s time for you to... ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 334
142076 Do you believe in the saying, \"First impression lasts?\" Why or... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 514
142075 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 2
142074 home work Àå*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 593
142073 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 406
142072 homework ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 352
142071 What is a good friend for me? À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 316
142070 Why Internet is the best invention ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 1
142069 If fathers want to have a multipurpose tool, what about young... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 453
142068 2 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 440
142067 4 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 381
142066 20 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 309
142065 What are your thoughts on kids staying on the phone for so long... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 414

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04