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영작교정 게시판

영어 말하기와 쓰기를 동시에 잡는다!

자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
회원님들께 무료로 제공해드리는 부가 서비스로, 전문 분야를 제외한 자유 주제
또는 강사님이 내주시는 과제를 회원님께서 영어로 작성해주시면,
담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

For buy-and-sell platforms like Daangn Inc., how can they ensure the safety of sellers and buyers to

작성자: 문*현
2025-02-18 261

회원님의 영작문

As a once passionate Daangn user, the scam happens during payment and identification. When it comes to payment, users must be allowed to transfer money on app. Usually Daangn users’ exchange cash or transfer money. However, there is increased privacy concern as many leaked bank account details are susceptible to financial crime. Then there is the issue of a refund. There are increased cases where buyers asked for the refund by threatening bad review and not returning the product. Therefore, there needs to be a system where seller deposits fee and buyer can collect it after sending the product out. Also, there is an issue with identification. Most of the buy-and-sell platforms offer job advertisements from their scalability. In some cases, job posts are fraudulent, and app users can be exposed to crime. Therefore, the company should monitor all the in-app activities and investigate when necessary. There can be a short interview done with the user when they post job advertisement.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Thank you for this Aciel! Good suggestion. It would be good for the mentioned services bellow to be available in the future.

As a once passionate Daangn user, the scam happens during payment and identification. 
>>>   correct
>>> OR: As a once passionate Daangn user, the scam usually take place during payment and identification. 
When it comes to payment, users must be allowed to transfer money on app. 
>>>  correct 
Usually Daangn users’ exchange cash or transfer money. 
>>> correct  
However, there is increased privacy concern as many leaked bank account details are susceptible to financial crime. 
>>>  correct 
Then there is the issue of a refund. 
>>> correct  
There are increased cases where buyers asked for the refund by threatening bad review and not returning the product. 
>>> correct
>>> OR: There are increased cases where buyers asked for the refund by threatening to post bad reviews and not returning the product.   
Therefore, there needs to be a system where seller deposits fee and buyer can collect it after sending the product out. 
>>>  correct   
Also, there is an issue with identification. 
>>>   correct  
Most of the buy-and-sell platforms offer job advertisements from their scalability. 
>>>   correct 
>>> OR: Most of the buy-and-sell platforms offer job advertisements depending on their scalability. 
In some cases, job posts are fraudulent, and app users can be exposed to crime. 
>>>  correct 
Therefore, the company should monitor all the in-app activities and investigate when necessary. 
>>>  correct 
There can be a short interview done with the user when they post job advertisement.
>>>  correct 
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첨삭이 가능하며,

올려주신 글의 강사님 첨삭은 24시간 이내에
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