¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the greatest lesson you have learned from a book or a movie?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-18 173

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your effort today.
I can see form your writing that you need to widen your vocabulary.
You have basic knowledge of sentence structure and that's a good start.
Now, we just need to make sure that you are familiar with the right terms for the right ideas.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
I learned the importance of moral standard in simple day by watching a movie which is shown the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball in LA Dodgers.
>> I learned the importance of moral standards on a simple day when watching a movie which showed the story of Shohei Othani who plays baseball for the LA Dodgers.
He picks up trashes as soon as realizes them on the street.
>> He picks up trash when he sees it on the street.
He believes that he gathers other's luck, although someone can comprehend them just a trash.
>> He believes that by doing so, he can gather others' luck while some people would just see it as trash.
His teach makes me pick up trashes on the street and I become to think in terms of my luck.
>> His philosophy encourages me to pick up trash on the street which I now think of as luck. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141977 13Jan2025_Homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 684
141976 Activities in Bohol ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 453
141975 How often do you go for health check-ups? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 5
141974 I\'don\'t agree the opinion. ÀÌ*Çü ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 454
141973 What¡¯s the best thing about Florida in your opinion? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 501
141972 What is your opinion on being unemployed? ¹Ú*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 580
141971 Beach ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 2
141970 If there is a type of dish you want to learn, what would it be... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-15 480
141969 Which is better to grow up in, poverty or in wealth? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 639
141968 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 1
141967 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 522
141966 fast food ÇÑ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 630
141965 Always remind \'Time is invaluable\' ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 2
141964 About my absent Àº*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 3
141963 The homework of 13th Jan. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 597
141962 Write about your best day last week. Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 501
141961 Do you want to be a firefighter? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 658
141960 Homework6 ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 639
141959 loneliness ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 461
141958 Sorry ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-14 621

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04