¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

expectation in class and teacher

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2025-02-12 222

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. it makes me time delay,,, how can I solve it?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Seung Min!
Thank you for your composition today.
Your expectations are noted.
Let's work together to achieve our goals.
Please review the corrections below.
Ask during the class if you have any questions.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
First of all, I want to be a influent speaker of english, because if I go abroad, communication with others in english is important.
>> First of all, I want to be fluent in speaking in English because if I go abroad, communicating with others using English is important. 
second, I need minimum 6.5 scores in IELTS test. 
>> Second, I need a minimum score of 6.5 on the IELTS test. 
In the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
>> During the test, I want to talk with no hesitation.
Third, when I talk in engish, my brain usually operates grammar. 
>> Third, when I speak in English, my brain usually analyzes grammar rules. 
it makes me time delay,,, 
>> It causes delay when I say something. 
how can I solve it?
>> How can I improve on this?
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141274 My toughest thing of experienced during my trip ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-02 1
141273 experiment ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 0
141272 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 2
141271 What are your thoughts on shopaholics? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 1732
141270 What are your thoughts on people who always move around or move... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 1857
141269 People get exercise while playing sports. Which sports are the... Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 2
141268 What is your earliest childhood memory? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 0
141267 Did you have a lot of friends when you were a child? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 0
141266 Are people using dogs as fashion accessories? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-01 2
141265 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 954
141264 What is more important to care for mental or physical health? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 1411
141263 Can you think of a time when helping someone was not a good idea? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 5
141262 Do you suffer from road rage? Have you seen any cases of people... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 4
141261 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 3
141260 Homework ·ù*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 897
141259 Homework ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 907
141258 Why do people leave your country? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 842
141257 Is it wise to have a boyfriend or girlfriend while still in... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 949
141256 HOMEWORK FOR 11.29.2024 WRITING TASK: How do you feel about... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 3
141255 Do you think the convenience of being constantly connected has... ¾È*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-29 949

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04