¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽг»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2025-02-09 728

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: It is believed that secondary school children should study international news as one of their school subjects. Others think that this is a waste of valuable school time. Discuss both views and give your opinions.

Studying international news can tell a lot. You can see international trends, know countries that are disadvantageous to you, and know the future.
However, studying such international news is less likely to change your country.
However, I feel that I need to study like that. Understanding the flow means being able to grasp the future, and through this, you can see that what needs to be carried forward and what benefits are high.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee! Thanks for doing your homework! Your essay demonstrates a clear understanding of the topic and effectively presents your argument. You¡¯ve shown strong analytical skills and made good connections between ideas. While your essay is well-developed, you could strengthen the clarity of your argument by incorporating more specific examples in the second paragraph. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Studying international news can tell a lot.
>>> Studying international news can give us a lot of learnings. 
 You can see international trends, know countries that are disadvantageous to you, and know the future.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
OR>>> You can identify global trends, recognize countries that may pose disadvantages, and gain insights into the future.
However, studying such international news is less likely to change your country.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, I feel that I need to study like that. 
>>> Therefore, I feel that I need to study it.
Understanding the flow means being able to grasp the future, and through this, you can see that what needs to be carried forward and what benefits are high.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142627 2/19 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 547
142626 Are there many Koreans who change their names ? What is usually... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 753
142625 MY MBTI ±è*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 564
142624 How do you usually handle stress? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 505
142623 Do you think listening to sad music when you\'re feeling down... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 508
142622 What kind of prank can you do? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 666
142621 My expectations. ¼Û*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 4
142620 homework ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-20 600
142619 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1
142618 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 0
142617 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 1
142616 If you had a different major in university, what could it be?... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 724
142615 Something to do È«*Àº ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 515
142614 Describe tulips. À¯*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 623
142613 The homework for February 17th. Á¶*È£ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 460
142612 Sleep is the best medicine for our health ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 3
142611 What are the biggest challenges facing each country\'s... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 3
142610 What are your thoughts on tall people becoming basketball... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 524
142609 How have gender roles in Korea changed over the past few decades? °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 2
142608 What¡¯s the best beach to visit in Korea? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-02-19 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ ͏°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öư Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽбÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î Çϰí ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04