¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Subjects taught in school

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿ø
2025-02-07 258

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think the subjects taught in school are nessasary because they contain fundamental contents for raising democratic citiizens. However, it is important to teach those not to memorize by discussing and critical thinking

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Ms. Rachel! Thanks for doing your homework! While your essay is well-developed, you could strengthen the clarity of your argument by incorporating more specific examples in the second paragraph. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think the subjects taught in school are necessary because they contain fundamental contents for raising democratic citizens.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
However, it is important to teach those not to memorize by discussing and critical thinking...
>>> CORRECT~!^^
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141182 If you could switch careers with someone famous for a day, who... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 644
141181 Which country would be the most enjoyable to live in? What makes... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 4
141180 Which is the best activity for tourism, domestic or... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 630
141179 What is more important to take care of: mental health or... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 4
141178 Hom work ½Å*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 705
141177 What do you think is the best way to end a weekend? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 630
141176 How can we be good friends to others? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 2
141175 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 0
141174 How do you choose which movie to watch? By the genre? The... ¹Ú*½Ä ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 753
141173 Very common, Very important ¾È*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 1
141172 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 640
141171 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 615
141170 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 666
141169 Do you think it\'s necessary to wear a dress shirt at work? Why... ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 671
141168 What are the advantages and disadvantages of having a sibling? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 644
141167 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 639
141166 being dentist ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 0
141165 dentist ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 1
141164 What¡¯s the most unforgettable experience you¡¯ve had with your... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 708
141163 Interview self introduction ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-26 642

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04