¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is work-life balance and why is it important?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼Û*ÈÆ
2025-02-06 418

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

In my opinion, work-life balance is ¡®you don¡¯t invest your whole time and energy in work so that you can enjoy your hobbies or spend time with people whom you love.¡¯
Since the industrial revolution, people had surplus time to spend of their lives because machines offered efficiency to human¡¯s work. Also work time decreased from 6days to 5days. People started to spend their surplus time in various kinds of ways. Mainstream of society persuaded people to enjoy their lives and emphasized personal happiness.
I believe work-life balance is important because people need break. Even the God took a rest on the 7th day in creation period. Rest gives people more energy and motivation so that people maintain health and strong will.
When my goal is achieved, I will go to the gym to gain muscles by working out after work and also I want to learn something new skills such as cooking or car maintenance.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Diego!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. You really did well! :)
~ T. Camille


In my opinion, work-life balance is ¡®you don¡¯t invest your whole time and energy in work so that you can enjoy your hobbies or spend time with people whom you love.¡¯
>> CORRECT!
Since the industrial revolution, people had surplus time to spend of their lives because machines offered efficiency to human¡¯s work. 
>> Since the industrial revolution, people had surplus time to spend on their lives because machines offered efficiency to human¡¯s work. 
Also, work time decreased from 6 days to 5 days. 
>> CORRECT!
People started to spend their surplus time in various kinds of ways. 
>> CORRECT!
Mainstream of society persuaded people to enjoy their lives and emphasized personal happiness.
>> The mainstream of society persuaded people to enjoy their lives and emphasized personal happiness.
I believe work-life balance is important because people need a break. 
>> CORRECT!
Even the God took a rest on the 7th day in creation period. 
>> Even God took a rest on the 7th day in the period of creation. 
Rest gives people more energy and motivation so that people maintain health and strong will.
>> CORRECT!
When my goal is achieved, I will go to the gym to gain muscles by working out after work and also I want to learn something new skills such as cooking or car maintenance.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138664 good manners in korea °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1243
138663 HOMEWORK FOR 07.22.2024 WRITING TASK: How do you decide on your... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 2
138662 Is the traditional ways of behavior are no longer relevant to... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1000
138661 What are acceptable reasons for missing an appointment? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1043
138660 What was your first day at work like? Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1156
138659 How frequently do you look at yourself in the mirror? How often... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1232
138658 How to decrease the crime rate ÇÑ*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 6
138657 Inside 2 ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1197
138656 Do you usually share your problems with your friends? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 2
138655 What do you think of high-end luxury brands? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 4
138654 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1334
138653 What do you think of the idea of naming babies after their... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1
138652 Right now, what is your concept of family? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1
138651 List down at least 5 things you expect to see and do in London. ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 2
138650 Homwork ½Å*Á¾ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 0
138649 Prefer to driving ±è*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1245
138648 Do you think snorkeling is a suitable activity for all ages?... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1350
138647 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ÁøÇàÁß 2024-07-22 1233
138646 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 1082
138645 H.W À¯*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-07-22 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04