¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think we can better protect ourselves from the flu?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-02-05 270

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had the flu twice about five years ago.
I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
First, we should look back on our eating habits.
It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.
And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David. Your response presents a clear and well-structured discussion on flu prevention. You effectively highlight the importance of a balanced diet and regular exercise, making your points easy to understand. Your reasoning is solid, and your writing demonstrates a strong grasp of the topic. Keep up the good work!


~ T. Lia


I had the flu twice about five years ago.
>> CORRECT


I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
>> CORRECT


Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
>> Looking back at that time, I was in an environment where I could easily catch the flu.


I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
>> CORRECT


First, we should look back on our eating habits.
>> CORRECT


It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
>> It is necessary for us to have balanced eating habits.


It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
>> CORRECT


In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.

>> In the end, these habits help enhance our immunity.


And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
>> Secondly, we have to exercise regularly.


Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
>> The flu is most prevalent during the cold winter.


The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
>> The cold weather makes us feel too lazy to exercise.


This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.
>> This habit eventually increases the risk of getting the flu.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141548 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 747
141547 Why do you want to be an Aircraft Engineer? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 593
141546 Which is better for effective learning, online or traditional... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 634
141545 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141544 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 692
141543 Homework ÇÑ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141542 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 463
141541 Do you think that one day, weddings will become a thing of the... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141540 How do you make sure to end a conversation in a polite and... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 1
141539 What are the benefits of having smoking areas in workplaces? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 623
141538 Do you think service jobs are respected in your country? Why or... ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 599
141537 What activity scares you but you still want to try? Explain ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 665
141536 What are you most excited about the winter vacation? Explain. ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 637
141535 How do you focus on what you need to do? Explain. ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 635
141534 What do you like most about ice skating? Explain. ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 787
141533 What are you most excited about for your coming holiday trip... ¿À*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 645
141532 What do you do to make your weekends special with your family? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 727
141531 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 655
141530 special food ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 0
141529 Christmas ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-17 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04