¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How do you think we can better protect ourselves from the flu?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ³ë*ö
2025-02-05 13

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I had the flu twice about five years ago.
I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
First, we should look back on our eating habits.
It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.
And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi David. Your response presents a clear and well-structured discussion on flu prevention. You effectively highlight the importance of a balanced diet and regular exercise, making your points easy to understand. Your reasoning is solid, and your writing demonstrates a strong grasp of the topic. Keep up the good work!


~ T. Lia


I had the flu twice about five years ago.
>> CORRECT


I know that the flu is completely different from a severe cold because I have experienced it.
>> CORRECT


Looking back at that time, I had an environment where I could get the flu easily.
>> Looking back at that time, I was in an environment where I could easily catch the flu.


I think two things are important to prevent the flu.
>> CORRECT


First, we should look back on our eating habits.
>> CORRECT


It is necessary for us to have a balanced eating habits.
>> It is necessary for us to have balanced eating habits.


It is important to eat foods rich in vitamin C and fiber.
>> CORRECT


In the end, these habits have the effect of enhancing our immunity.

>> In the end, these habits help enhance our immunity.


And secondly, we have to exercise regularly.
>> Secondly, we have to exercise regularly.


Flu is mostly prevalent in the cold winter.
>> The flu is most prevalent during the cold winter.


The cold weather makes us lazy to exercise.
>> The cold weather makes us feel too lazy to exercise.


This habit eventually increases the chances of getting the flu.
>> This habit eventually increases the risk of getting the flu.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
142058 Homework ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 225
142057 Is there anything that helps you feel better when you\'re... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 247
142056 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 246
142055 culinary trend ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 159
142054 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 126
142053 1/17 Homework ±Ç*ºó ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 145
142052 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 251
142051 Page 5 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2025-01-20 0
142050 What¡¯s the worst way to spend a weekend? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-19 231
142049 Have you ever tried alternative medicine, like acupuncture or... ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2025-01-19 3
142048 What\'s your favorite story book? Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-19 242
142047 homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-19 1
142046 Are celebrities good role models for young people °­*¼º ¿Ï·á 2025-01-19 222
142045 11 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 242
142044 15 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 236
142043 17 ÀÓ*½Ç ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 248
142042 Skills or strengh ¼Û*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 229
142041 Does gardening help you relax your mind? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 1
142040 What do you think is the most important skill for customer... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2025-01-18 231
142039 My favorite movie ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2025-01-17 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04