¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Is there a difference in the way Koreans celebrate the Korean New Year and the Western New Year (Jan

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Â÷*Áø
2025-02-04 65

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Yes, because Korean New Year is eat a rice cake soup and ring the bell but Western is enjoy a party for example Greece is Hang onions in the door and Denmark is dive on sofa.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's your corrected composition, Yale! Many thanks for sending it. Please take a look at the few revisions and alternative expressions provided.  


Cheers,
Jean~~



                                          

                  Is there a difference in the way Koreans celebrate the Korean New Year and the Western New Year?


Yes, because Korean New Year is eat a rice cake soup and ring the bell but Western is enjoy a party for example Greece is Hang onions in the door and Denmark is dive on sofa.
>> Yes, because Koreans celebrate Korean New Year by eating rice cake soup and ringing the bell but Western New Year is celebrated by enjoying parties. For example, in Greece, they hang onions at their doors, and in Denmark, they dive on their sofas.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141230 the road ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 2
141229 Which is a better viewing experience, watching plays or watching... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 672
141228 What might happen if you don¡¯t use any phones in a day, week,... ÀÌ*Å ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 606
141227 How would your life be different without access to technology? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 580
141226 Is the weather in a country important when you choose a place to... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 616
141225 What annoys you when you hang out with your friends? ÃÖ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1
141224 Homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1
141223 LCDS interview 7,8 ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 561
141222 LCDS interview answer 5,6 ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 587
141221 LCDS Interview answer 4 ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 601
141220 LCDS interview 3 ÀÌ*ÀÎ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 555
141219 How do you relax after a busy day? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 4
141218 The first snow of this year ÀÌ*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-28 1
141217 What makes people violent? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 599
141216 Are you curious about your future? Why or why not? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 569
141215 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 603
141214 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 524
141213 How can we disconnect from our phones to truly experience the... ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 631
141212 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 1
141211 The effect of brave on my life Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-27 982

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04