¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

First essay!!

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¹Î
2025-01-22 320

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Summer became longer and hotter because of climate change. So UV is stronger than before. Originally, the rain period is on August. So it was raining almost everyday. But it was raining occasionally during the rain period of this year. Long time ago, our four seasons are very distinct. But nowdays, spring and fall are too short, summer and winter are too long. And spring is also cold like winter, fall is also hot like summer. Their boundary is very ambiguous. For example, yellow dust is originally character of spring. But yellow dust severely appeared on January

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Yumin!!!

I encourage you to to assess yourself and set up your goals, these goals are ownership or your learnings. So start setting up your goals if life and especially in setting up your goals in learning English these are your treasures. I can see you your potentials in speaking keep it up.!!!!
T. Jeny


Summer became longer and hotter because of climate change.
>>Summer has become longer and hotter because of climate change.
 So UV is stronger than before. Originally, the rain period is on August. 
>>So the UV is stronger than before. Originally, the rain period was in August. 
So it was raining almost everyday. 
>>So it was raining almost every day.
But it was raining occasionally during the rain period of this year. 
>>Correct
OR>>But for last year, it rained occasionally.
Long time ago, our four seasons are very distinct. 
>>Correct
But nowdays, spring and fall are too short, summer and winter are too long.
>>But nowadays, spring and fall are too short, and summer and winter are too long.
 And spring is also cold like winter, fall is also hot like summer. 
>>Spring is also cold like winter, and fall is also hot like summer. 
Their boundary is very ambiguous.
>>Correct
 For example, yellow dust is originally character of spring.
>>For example, yellow dust was only common in spring.
 But yellow dust severely appeared on January
>>But now we can experience yellow dust as early as January.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141439 Page.9 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-11 2
141438 What made you interested in doing Mixed Martial Arts? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 871
141437 Which is better for communication, e-mail or handwritten letters? ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 754
141436 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 856
141435 What do you think of men who apply makeup on their faces or use... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 784
141434 What are your thoughts on kids having slumber parties regularly? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 566
141433 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1
141432 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 572
141431 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 722
141430 06Dec2024_Homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 770
141429 09Dec2024_Homework ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 592
141428 What is your favorite comfort food and why? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 708
141427 How do you feel better when you\'re sad or angry? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 642
141426 Job interview_self introduction ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 641
141425 How do you make the most of your life every day? Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 5
141424 About studying µµ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 691
141423 snow ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1
141422 party ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 1
141421 HOMEWORK FOR 12.06.2024 WRITING TASK: What is your source of... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 2
141420 Tell me how orchestra concerts influence your emotions and... ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-10 849

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04