¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What is the best food to eat when you are sick?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÇÑ*¿¬
2025-01-21 38

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
It makes me powerful and happy.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Nicole!
You did so well! I'm so proud of your writing! Keep up the good job and take note of the corrections as well so you can improve more. Great writing! See you on Thursday!
~~Teacher Kate 

The rice porridge is the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>CORRECT!
Because I can easily eat when I don't want to eat anything.
>>Because I can eat it easily, even when I don¡¯t feel like eating anything.
Also, It is easy to make with a rice and water.
>>It is also simple to make with just rice and water.
And the sweet food like chocolate and jelly are also the best food to eat when I am sick.
>>Sweet foods like chocolate and jelly are also great to eat when I am sick. 
It makes me powerful and happy.
>>CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
141580 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 424
141579 How does the location of a business affect its success? ÀÌ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 406
141578 I will be discouraged when I can\'t ask help to my family or... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 328
141577 New activities I want to try in Jeju Island ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 347
141576 The improvement of social welfare I want for next president ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 295
141575 What do you usually do when the weather is so cold in Busan? ³ë*ö ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 387
141574 Homework ÀÌ*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 0
141573 Hi, Ms Gemma teacher~! ±è*³ª ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 403
141572 What is the best age for a person to settle down and get... Àå*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 2
141571 Writing task: In your opinion, what is the best age to be? What... ¿À*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 0
141570 If you could have any workout buddy (real or fictional), who... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 383
141569 Under what conditions would you take someone\'s job on a weekend? ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 235
141568 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-19 1
141567 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 376
141566 Do you like meeting new people? ¼Û*ÀÚ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 5
141565 Homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 314
141564 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 1
141563 Homework & Question ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 395
141562 What does ¡°stay positive in a negative situation¡± mean? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 410
141561 Homework ÇÑ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-12-18 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04