¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

It was a fantastic trip ever in Jeju Island!

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2024-12-26 829

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I was worried before the trip, because the weather would be cold, windy and snowy severely!

The first day was as bad as the weather forecast. It was super windy and suddenly hailed!
So we were very worried that each other's body condition got worse because my friend caught a cold before the trip.

However, the other days was sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias, visited the traditional market at the second day.

Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the open time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce

And we visited snoopy garden at final day.
I hope to visit there again in spring or summer, because there will be more beautiful with various flowers!

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there again, Min!

All is well that ends well. You planned your trip, you went there, and finally had a blast! I am so glad that your itineraries went well in spite of all the weather advisory.

As promised, you made a composition of all the activities that you enjoyed and I could not be happier that your completed all the destinations of the restaurants and the camellias which were on top of your list. The next time you go to Jeju Island, you will have a different set of activities and places to discover. Keep your curiosity and adventurous spirit alive!

As you can see with your lengthy piece of writing, you were able to compose so many correct sentences. Always study carefully the suggestions made and make sure you know use them correctly on your next composition. overall, it was excellent!

See you again here next time!

-T. Donna~

I was worried before the trip, because the weather would be cold, windy and snowy severely!
>>  Correct!

The first day was as bad as the weather forecast. It was super windy and suddenly hailed!
So we were very worried that each other's body condition got worse because my friend caught a cold before the trip.
>>  Correct! Very good sentences!

However, the other days was sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias, visited the traditional market at the second day.
>> However, the other days were sunny! (It was still windy but it was okay to travel.)
So we enjoyed the scenery of camellias and visited the traditional market at the second day.


Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the open time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce
>> Also we visited a famous pork cutlet restaurant at the third day.
We waited since 9 am even though the opening time was 12 pm! (Fortunately we could receive the waiting ticket at 10 am)
And we came back to this restaurant at 2 pm, and enjoyed our meals.
It was delicious because the sauce is different from any other restaurants. We guessed that the chef make his own sauce.



And we visited snoopy garden at final day.
>> And, we visited the Snoopy Garden at the final day.

I hope to visit there again in spring or summer, because there will be more beautiful with various flowers!
>> I hope to visit there again in spring or summer because it will be more beautiful with various flowers!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134363 Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in... Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1611
134362 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What is your... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134361 What healthy habits do you have (such as washing your hands... ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2259
134360 Would you prefer to be the most beautiful person in the room or... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134359 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What is your... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134358 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2105
134357 Time management is essential. Give one tip on how to manage your... ±è*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134356 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1415
134355 Why is it good to save money? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1543
134354 Do you think online gambling is dangerous? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2784
134353 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134352 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134351 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134350 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2
134349 Survey ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1
134348 Important qualities in a friend ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1510
134347 free of press ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2071
134346 How do you manage time when you have a lot of activities to do?... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 0
134345 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 1472
134344 When is a family member considered to be a \"black sheep\"? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-31 2146

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04